Winter is supposed to be cold….. right???

 

I gotta tell ya!….. I had all that lovely time off over the Christmas holidays, and I had all these visions of long cozy days by the fire, curled up with a naughty novel or binging on some Netflix series or another.  Oh sure… there are tons of projects that I could have gotten around to getting done, but really, I had both my girls close by, there was shopping to do, and good food to eat, and family game night, and Christmas.  I did mention that it was a vision right…… I’ve have had visions before if you recall ( see blog #1) and as with that vision…. this one didn’t go exactly as I thought it would…….. Not quite sure why I bother creating lovely visions anymore…… I should know better!

So…. what did happen??

Snow!!  It finally showed up…. Just in time for Christmas, which was great ’cause who doesn’t love snow at Christmas time? But slogging through that snow to feed and water all the animals….. that resembles exercise which I am well known for avoiding at all costs.  Since this is my second winter and I put on my snow smarty pants, I had some aces in my back pocket.  What is this ace of which I speak???  Purchase #1 – a toboggan!!!  Good old fashioned, industrial strength utility toboggan!  Hauls feed, hauls water ( this becomes very important later in this story!) hauls wood……and!…… creates lovely paths that takes away some of the slogging through knee deep snow out of the way.  Not wasting all that previous winter experience…. not this girl…..!  I am not the most graceful creature under the best of circumstances – slogging through snow requires balance, and I don’t have that in abundance.  So I am just making sure that I don’t do a face plant in the lovely snow!  Best $80 bucks we’ve ever spent.

Next up…….???

Bitter, bitter, bitter cold and a new understanding of the effects of wind chill.  Holy Hannah it got cold.  Not city cold.  Oh no!   It got Calgary/Edmonton/Alaska cold.  I had never really experienced that kind of cold.  Before we came out here, I would hear the weatherman talk about the cold temperatures – “minus a million degrees in Calgary” – and then they would mention something like “with the wind chill – that’s minus a billion degrees” – and I always wondered what the heck they meant by that.  So let me explain what they mean by that.  That means that you will be required to put on leggings, then pants, then thick socks that are long enough for you to tuck both your leggings and your pants into.  Next you will need a long sleeve T-shirt over which it is best to don a flannel shirt – said flannel shirt should be long enough to cover you to mid-thigh.  (Insider tip – warm your flannel shirt first by briefly laying it across the top of the woodstove – just be careful of the metal snaps when you put it on!).  We’re almost there – now add your winter jacket – this should also cover you to at least mid-thigh and is useless if it doesn’t have a hood.  Shove your feet into the biggest, heaviest snow boots that you can find ( they sell them with stickers on them that say – “good to minus 50 degrees) and they must have the little draw string thingy’s at the top to keep the snow out.  The snow will be deep enough to bury your entire boot.  Add a toque to the top of your head, pull the hood up over the hat, get your hands in some gloves and then add a scarf to your ensemble.  Move as fast as it is humanly possible to move in this get up, to wherever you are going.  I’m mostly headed to the car and I have to tell you….. when I got in the car one morning and it told me it was -22 degrees, I gave some brief thought as to whether it was feasible to move back to the city.  All the locals are telling us this is unusual winter cold for these parts…. but they are a sneaky bunch…… this could be a “pull their leg” joke on their part!

Now we add…….

Wind….. seriously!!??  I HATE wind!  Last year we had all these lovely winter days!  Calm, sunny and cold yes, but not windy.  Not cut through all those layers of clothes that you put on wind….. not chilled to minus a gazillion degrees wind that makes your lips crack and your face numb.  This has gotten me thinking about the animals….. because, of course, all this cold ickyness is intruding on my lovely vision of lounging my way through my holidays, but if there were no animals to deal with …. then I wouldn’t have to go outside into the popsicle world!!! But I love our babies and despite hating wind, I was worried about all our little ones.  So with the arrival of the snow and the cold and the wind, came some new problems we hadn’t previously had to deal with.  A new problem to solve you say….. oh yes.  Where there is snow, cold and wind and there are also animals – there is going to be ICE!!  Water given to animals turns to ice in these conditions!  I kid you not!!  Would you like to hazard a guess how fast the water for the animals turned to ice…???  On the worst days….. about 2 hours….. tops.   Run through the dressing ritual in your head…… keep that in mind and consider the following schedule:

• 7am – rise and dress (see above) prepare bucket of alfalfa pellets for the bunnies, and a bucket of chicken scratch for the chickens.  Fill 6-8 large jugs with hot water.  Place it all in the sled and head to the animals.  Open the chicken coup and lay out their food, de-ice their water.  Collect any eggs before they freeze. Head to the rabbits – top up their food – de-ice their water.   Head to the shed – drop the feed buckets and fill the sled with wood for the woodstove – you are gonna need it.
• Remove outdoor wear including boots – pull on slippers,  start fire in woodstove, place toque and gloves near the woodstove –  have coffee and breakfast.  Relax until 9am (keep eye on fire!).    Fill jugs with hot water again. Put outer clothes back on – pull on boots – place slippers under the woodstove.  Enjoy the nice warm toque and gloves – the warmth doesn’t last!   Put another log on the fire. Go back out to the animals – feed – de-ice their water.  Collect any additional eggs that you can find.
• Schlepp back to the house again.  Remove outdoor wear including boots.  Put on  nicely warmed slippers.  Replace gloves and toque near the fire. You have 2 hours free time – enjoy!
• 11 am  – Slice apples or carrots and other goodies for the animals – It’s treat time! Fill the water jugs with hot water…. and you know the dressing drill at this point……. and off you go.
• Water again at 1:30pm – don’t forget to add wood to the fire.  Warm slippers will await you!
• 4pm – Chickens get more feed – everybody gets more warm water. Dress and undress…. again!
• 7pm – Treat time again for the rabbits – plus more pellets – so a side trip to the feed shed for alfalfa pellets.  But before you go – it is now dark – pitch black.  You get to add to your ensemble – another “must have” purchase! – a head lamp to put over top of your toque! These have also been a godsend!  Feed and hand out warm water to the bunnies along with lots of comfy hay. Now… chase the chickens back into the coup – more on this process in another blog – lock them in with their heat lamp and warm water for the night.   Swing by the feed shed on the way back to fill up your feed buckets and take them back with you so they are ready in the morning to start the process again.

And repeat…… for days!!!  Sheesh…. another lovely vision fail! But… as you are no doubt figuring out, I really wouldn’t change a thing.  Absolutely nuthin!